Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Thanks, Nouwen

"Today, O Lord, I felt intense fear. My whole being seemed to be invaded by fear. No peace, no rest; just plain fear: fear of mental breakdown, fear of living the wrong life, fear of rejection and condemnation, and fear of you. O Lord, why is it so hard to overcome my fear? Why is it so hard to let your love banish my fear? Only when I worked with my hands for a while did it seem that the intensity of the fear decreased.

I feel so powerless to overcome this fear. Maybe it is your way of asking me to experience some solidarity with the fearful people all over the world: those who are hungry and cold in this harsh winter, those who are threatened by unexpected guerrilla attacks, and those who are hidden in prisons, mental institutions, and hospitals. O Lord, this world is full of fear. Make my fear into a prayer for the fearful. Let that prayer lift up the hearts of others. Perhaps then my darkness can become light for others, and my inner pain a source of healing for others.

You, O Lord, have also known fear. You have been deeply troubled: your sweat and tears were the signs of your fear. Make my fear, O Lord, part of yours, so that it will lead me not to darkness but to the light, and will give me new understanding of the hope of your cross."


~Henri Nouwen

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

I'm feeling anxious today. It's not my favorite feeling.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

In Search Of

I found this in a magazine and it rang true.

"Went looking for self. Found others."

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Dear Life,

Dear Life,

Some days your uncertainty is too much for me. Other days it feels like a grand adventure. Common sense tells me the middle ground is where I should strive to exist. Experience tells me the safety of the middle is actually the most dangerous place to be. Life, teach me kindly to accept the uncertainty and embrace the adventure. The road ahead is long. I pray we've only just begun.